Of Hermione And Bad Mood
by Evilism
Summary: Set during Harry's Sixth Year. Snape's usual pointsdeducting takes a whole new twist when Hermione decided that her day's been bad enough without him. A war has begun. CHAPTER 2: MARRIAGE LAW: SAVIOUR OF GRYFFINDOR


Of Hermione And Bad Mood.

"I've got it all but I feel so deprived," moaned a blonde Slytherin Prefect very audibly, as he absent-mindedly sprinkled a pinch of powdered viper's fangs into his Obtorpescio Potion. The high decibels were intentional, and Draco Malfoy had no desire to keep his voice to a bare minimum. "It is so hard having everything, you know?" he asked Crabbe. "Looks, money, pure, untainted blood……."

At the table beside his, a boy with strands of ginger drooping into his eyes gnashed his teeth and thrust a fist of powder into his own potion. "Remind me why we're taking Potions, mate," he muttered to Harry Potter. "I mean, we want to be Aurors, right? I've no idea who tampered with the education system; Aurors do the fighting! Are we seriously expected to concoct serums when some random Azkaban-runaway is shoving his wand into our faces?"

"I mean, look at the poor, unfortunate folks, Crabbe," continued Draco loudly. "They don't have a single galleon in their pockets; just flint and fluff." He gave an exaggerated sigh, and threw Ron a smug glance. "And to top it off, they lack talent as well."

Ron slipped a hand into his pocket surreptitiously. Sure enough, his wiggling fingers did not produce any hearty rattling of coins, only the muffed sounds of pocket flint.

Hermione Granger was stirring the substance in her cauldron with a stony look on her grim face, but even she could not ignore the downright annoying voice coming from Draco. "He has the looks, my foot," she snapped, disgruntled. "I wonder if anyone would be foolish enough to swoon at a vampiric face, eyes so slitted that it's a miracle he could see through them, and barely enough talent to elevate a feather _in the presence of wind_."

"TEN POINTS FROM GRYFFINDOR."

Hermione lifted her face in surprise. The Potions Master was standing directly behind her, with a countenance so sour that Ron seriously contemplated the possibility that Snape had been sucking on lemons.

But Hermione was in a rather bad mood herself. Lavender Brown had been pestering her for spells to turn herself into a centaur, despite being told repeatedly that a relationship with Firenze was out of the question. And here was Snape, casually deducting precious points without a solid basis! Catastrophe was brewing, and Snape had just pushed the trigger.

"And pray tell, Professor, what have us Gryffindors done to irk your sensitive soul?" she said as calmly as she could. Hermione had once walked out of Divination class – for good – and Ron feared that the scenario might be re-enacted in a few minutes time.

Draco, on the other hand, was watching the confrontation with a gaping mouth; most uncharacteristic of a so-called well-bred Pureblood. His Obtorpescio completely forgotten, the Slytherin stood transfixed. Nosiness personified.

"You know better than I do," snarled Snape, his black eyes flashing dangerously. "And don't tempt me to deduct more."

"Sorry, Professor," said Hermione cheerfully. "I'm afraid that I'm feeling a little blonde today. My infamous 'know-it-all-ness' has deserted me. Please, tell me what I have done."

Draco scowled. He was blonde.

"You insulted a student of mine, you stupid girl," snapped Snape. His sallow face was turning an unpleasant shade of purple. Ron bit his lip. Snape rarely turned purple. Things were getting bad.

"Oh? Who says that that was an insult? I was merely stating the truth."

"I'll have none of your cheek, you insolent-"

"Cheek? What cheek? In case you haven't noticed, I'm not giving you my cheeks. Why would I want to do that? I'd look horrible without cheeks. You have your own cheeks. I'm keeping mine, for obvious reasons," grinned Hermione, putting on a puzzled look for added effect.

Ron shut his eyes. Harry frowned, a pensive look on his haggard face. Draco sighed happily. His dreams were finally coming true. _The Mudblood will be expelled_, he told himself. _At last!_

"You….you can't be this stupid!" exploded Snape in disbelief. "You got the highest number of O.W.L.s in the history of Hogwarts, for goodness' sake!"

"Eh?" blinked Hermione, thoroughly enjoying herself. "Professor, I've only got a cat, Crookshanks! I've no owls….unless someone's planning to give me one later, of course."

"Quit that act!" shouted Snape, slowly but steadily losing his sanity. "I abhor this attitude even more than your superior one!"

"Superior? Me?" gasped Hermione, widening her eyes. "Why, my good Professor, I can barely perform a simple engorgement charm, and here you are, calling me superior! Well, well, well. Will wonders never cease."

Snape crossed his arms across his chest. "Oh, really?" he inquired softly. Hermione stared determinedly into his eyes, but she could feel her cockiness fading. He was, after all, an ex-Death Eater, a spy for the Order of the Phoenix. What tricks did he have up those black sleeves of his?

"Then tell me, Miss Granger, how did you manage to obtain 'Outstanding' for _every single examination_? If you really are asinine as you claim to be, then my guess is that you _cheated_. And you know what they do to cheats, don't you?"

The bushy-haired Prefect held her tongue. Ron kept shaking his head and muttering, "Oh, no. Oh, no." Harry stared intently at Hermione, hoping against hope that she would be able to weasel her way out of the difficult situation. Draco's mouth was still hanging open. He had cavities. A fly flew into his mouth, and was promptly swallowed before he could realise what he had done.

"I-I" faltered Hermione. "I know."

"Then did you or did you not cheat? If you didn't you'd be admitting that your recent remarks are insults, directed towards me. That would earn your good house another 200 points…in negative. If you did, indeed, cheat, then I would be forced to refer the matter to Professor Dumbledore who has the happy privilege of expelling you. Did you cheat?"

The entire classroom was so silent that you could've heard a pin drop. One did, and was hastily picked up by a very embarrassed Neville Longbottom.

"I…………"

"Yes?"

"Umm…."

"Go on."

"Ah-ha!"

Snape jumped a little. "Ah-ha?"

"Sir, it has just crossed my mind that 1000 points ought to be taken from Slytherin, then."

The Potions Master went several shades of violet. "HOW SO!"

"Because you just 'insulted' the competence of the examiners by implying that I cheated. Tut tut."

Snape was so furious that was trembling in his shoes. "HOW DARE YOU DIVERT ATTENTION FROM YOUR SINS BY USING ME AS THE SCAPEGOAT!"

Hermione smiled. Suddenly, she didn't look so 'blonde' anymore. In fact, a slight glint in her eyes indicated that her smile was a lot less innocent than it appeared to be.

"I dare, Professor, because I'm an insufferable know-it-all, remember?"

A/N: Heh.


End file.
